this life.

i am a pebble. lying on the ocean floor.

i am suddenly tossed aside by a shattering wave. now i am falling. falling through the graves of the water. finally, finally, i am washed ashore. but then i am washed back. i cannot stay. the waves grope at me and pull me out again. again, and again, i am pushed, pulled, rolled around. i once again reach the shore and try as hard as i can to stay on the ground. i made it, and i relax. trying to live life here where i am. it is ok. i know life here. and i am comfortable.

all too soon, though, another huge wave comes crashing towards me. it pulls me down, and nothing i do can hold me back. once again, i have to relocate and change my life. my circumstances are such a huge part of what i'm feeling. one day, i find myself far up on the shore. there is no way the wave can reach me. i am really loving life and enjoying it where i am. suddenly, a hand reaches out and flings me back to sea.

why? why does life have to be such a series of changes? why can't i live where i like it?

and i have noticed that the waves are shaping me. i am not who i used to be. every time another wave pushes me, i let a little bit of myself in that place. slowly, i am changing, and there's nothing i can do, but change along with my life and circumstances. because all of life is a process of changing. and i am grateful i can change. but why does it have to be so hard?

i am a pebble. rolling in the waves. waiting to see where else i will be thrown.